Tuesday, August 31

Blogger ate Britney Spears

A letter to Blogger:

Dear Blogger, 
You suck! (Well today at least, you know I love you)
How am I supposed to entice my readers with my funny stories and random anecdotes when you eat them?  I hope my pictures were a nice little bite of dessert to satisfy your appetite.   
I just typed out the cutest little blog, but you ate it. No, devoured it and didn't even save me a copy.  I mean seriously, you save a draft every 15 seconds, yet in the entire 15 minute I spent typing that blog, you didn't manage to save once?  Awesome!


Now, I shall continue.

A letter to Britney:

Dear Britney Jean Spears,
I love you.  Yes you lean a bit towards the white trashy side, but who doesn't have a little trash hidden under they nicely buttoned cardigans and yellow box flip flops.  I know I do.  It seems that you are getting your life back on track and I am really excited about that.  I know you derailed for a while, what with the failed marriage, the second failed marriage, a psych hold, the drugs and alcohol, and the like, but I also know deep down you were still that sweet little mickey mouse club and Justin Timberlake loving girl that we all grew up loving.  Now, you may be the punch line of jokes, but I think secretly everyone pulls for you...I do.  The new boyfriend, recording new music, letting your dad help steer you in the right direction are all signs that the little girl from Louisiana is still in there somewhere.  But Britney dear there is still one area of your life that I am uncertain of and frankly I am quite embarrassed for you...your hair.  (I hang my hair in shame for you).  I already acknowledged the tough times you when through back in 2007 that led you from this:
( "Y'all look at my beautiful hair" )

To this:

( "Look y'all I ain't got a hur on my head" )

It has been over two years since that unfortunate incident and while the rest of your life seems to have recovered, your hair...not so much.  There is no excuse for you to still have locks that look like they got caught in a meat grinder.
One word:  Unacceptable
This look isn't even appropriate for a Halloween costume.  I urge you Brit Brit to work on it.  Call your stylist. No wait, fire your stylist and hire a new one, because if your current one let you leave the house like this (and fairly often I might add) then they are no friend of yours.  Do you even have real hair?  I am beginning to wonder...  Until you get it figured out I will be rooting (pun intended) for you.  You got your life in order, now just you just need to get to salon, until then take those extensions out, let your scalp breath girlfriend.

Love ya,
Chelle L




3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am dying laughing right now. I couldn't have said it better.

Maloree said...

oh my goodness Chelle! The funniest blog I've ever read!

Chelle said...

Thanks girls! I have been really upset about the state of her hair for a while now, so I felt it was time to address it.

See what else Monkey Loo has to share

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